Healing from the Inside Out: A Guide to Internal Family Systems and the 8 C's of Self-Energy for Emotional Healing and Integration
“Self isn't a psychological concept, it's much more of a spiritual essence that can be in us and can be a field around us." — Dr. Richard Schwartz
When it comes to understanding and addressing the symptoms and challenges in our lives, it can be easy to fall into the trap of thinking something is "wrong" with us. But what if there was a way to approach these difficulties that didn't involve labelling or pathologising ourselves? Enter Internal Family Systems (IFS), founded by Richard Schwartz, a non-pathologising, trauma-informed framework that focuses on exploring the many, and often misunderstood parts of ourselves.
IFS is based on the idea that we all have different "parts", aspects or subpersonalities within us, each with their own unique motivations, thoughts, feelings, and experiences. Think of the movie Inside Out, each part has its own memories, experiences, feelings and sensations. These parts can include things like the inner critic, the protector, the wounded child, the distractor, the substance user, the people-pleaser, the hot-head, and so on.
There are two classifications of parts in IFS: Protectors and Exiles.
Protectors are understood by how they attempt to save us from our vulnerable parts (Exiles) that are viewed as too overwhelming and detrimental to the internal system. The protectors usually work to prevent an Exile from surfacing (Proactive Manager), or push it back into exile and away from conscious awareness (Reactive Firefighter).
Managers are the proactive parts that are in charge of maintaining order and control in the system. They tend to enforce strict rules or regulations which often govern the behaviour of other parts and enforce them strongly. For example, if we have a strong need for control or hypervigilence in our lives, we may have a manager part that is trying to maintain a sense of stability, power and safety.
Firefighters are the reactive parts that come out when other parts are in distress. They may engage in behaviours that are viewed as self-destructive or harmful to others in order to manage overwhelming emotions or thoughts. For example, if we overeat or use specific substances to cope with anxiety, we may have a firefighter part that is trying to help relieve our distress of feeling lonely and unloved. Another example, if we get angry at our partner, our firefighter part might be trying to relieve our distress of feeling powerless and unworthy.
Exiles are the vulnerable parts that are exiled or buried within our psyche, they often hold memories and emotions from traumatic or difficult experiences. They are isolated from the rest of the system and may not be fully recognised or understood. These are the parts that we are generally too ashamed or afraid to show to the world. For example, if we suppressed memories of childhood abuse, we may have an exile part that holds the pain and fear associated with those experiences. The burdens we may hold can involve feelings of shame, unworthiness, rejection, abandonment, not being loved or good enough and terror.
The above are just examples and everyone’s collection of parts, protectors, and vulnerabilities will present uniquely. It should be noted that the classification of protectors, i.e., whether they’re a manager or firefighter isn’t something to fret over. The important thing to understand is how they show up when they’re trying their best to support us, are they proactive in their attempts or are they reactive to certain situations?
In IFS all parts are seen as inherently good and trying to help us in some way, but unfortunately and not within their awareness, they may be misguided in their supportive efforts. For example, an inner critic (Manager) might be trying to help by preventing any mistakes from happening, it might have only learned strategies that involve self-criticism, self-hatred and self-blame.
A goal within IFS is to help these parts release their burdens by reconnecting them with our authentic "Self" energy, i.e., the innate part of us that has clarity and is compassionate, curious, confident, courageous, connected, creative, and calm. These are known as the "8 C's" of Self-energy.
Below reflects how we can embody the 8 C’s for healing and integration.
Compassionate: This C refers to the ability to approach ourselves and our parts with kindness and understanding. It means treating ourselves with the same care and empathy that we would offer to a friend or loved one.
Curious: This C is about being open and interested in exploring ourselves and our parts. It's about being willing to learn and discover new things about ourselves, without judgement or preconceived notions.
Creativity: This C is about using our imagination and unique perspective to find new ways of understanding ourselves and our parts. Creativity supports flexibility in our thinking and approaches, opening us up to experimenting and trying new things to find what works best for us.
Confident: This C is about having faith in our ability to heal and integrate our parts. It's about knowing that we have the resources within us to find balance and wholeness.
Courageous: This C is about facing our fears and pain, and being willing to go into difficult or uncomfortable territory to heal.
Clarity: This C is about being clear and objective in our understanding of ourselves and our parts. It's about being able to see things as they are, rather than through the filter of our emotional reactions, burdens or biases.
Connectedness: This C is about feeling connected to ourselves, others and the collective. It's about recognising that we are all interconnected and that our healing and growth can have a positive impact on those around us.
Calm: This C is about being able to maintain a sense of inner peace and balance, even amid turmoil or stress. It's about being able to find a sense of stillness and grounding in ourselves and carrying that with us as we navigate the ups and downs of life.
Self is an essence from which the 8C’s are available, however, the 8C’s are not exclusive to the Self. The Self can have many more qualities that can be expressed. Not all of these qualities are needed to heal parts and parts can also have the qualities and essence of Self within them. By strengthening the relationship between Self and parts we can begin to imprint these qualities in our parts and release them from their burdens.
Connecting to our Self-energy allows us to offer our wounded parts a new attachment figure that is able to hold space and attune their needs
Thus, we can access a deeper understanding of ourselves and our parts, and begin the process of healing and integration. One way to do this is through a daily practice of getting to know our parts. This can be done through journaling, visualisation, or even talking to our parts as if they were separate people. The key is to approach this process with compassion, curiosity, and an open mind.
It's also important to remember that all parts are welcome in IFS — our parts are not "bad" or "wrong," but rather they are simply trying to protect us in the best way they know how. By approaching them with kindness and understanding, we can begin to see the underlying needs and experiences that are driving their behaviour.
This is the beauty of Internal Family Systems — when we understand and accept our multiplicity from a non-pathologising, trauma-informed framework we can powerfully and impactfully address the underlying symptoms and challenges in our lives that have been holding us back from reaching our highest potential.
By connecting to our authentic Self and getting to know our parts, we can begin the process of healing and integration, leading to a more balanced, liberated, and fulfilled life.
If you feel called to try IFS and see how it can help you connect to yourself and your parts, then explore the services I offer, or the International and Australian IFS Directories can connect you with other practitioners trained in IFS.
Please reach out via my contact form or Instagram if you have any curiosities or parts that want to share.
With oodles of warmth,
Tash
